I'm trying to focus..

I'm trying to focus..

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[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[05 Oct 2004|03:56am]

wow.. you suck if you're reading this right now.
i got a new journal, comment if you realllly want it and don't know it by now. =) <3

[ 2 thorns Scratch away the skin]

[10 Mar 2004|05:03pm]

[ mood | pissed off ]

I'm thinking of making a new journal here soon.
My mom doesnt trust me enough, so she has to read my journal.
Damn..
I'll just add you guys when I do make a new one.
you'll probably know it's me. if not, I'll comment.
yeah.. I'll still be kind of writing in this one for a bit.
nothing major.

[ 5 thorns Scratch away the skin]

[09 Mar 2004|11:32pm]

[ mood | drained ]

Today turned out to be shit..
But, I got a message that made me feel better.
You know who you are, and thanks.

'So, would I be out of line if I said I miss you?'
:\

I can't deal with this shit.
I haven't talked to him since the other night.
I can't stop thinking about that night.. or you.
I know, most of you are thinking 'you're stupid for going back to him'
I know I am.. But I can't help it.
I really like him.
..I don't know. I just don't want to be fucked over again.
and be put into one of those damn breakdowns again.
I can't handle that any more.

Yeah...

[ 2 thorns Scratch away the skin]

[09 Mar 2004|03:55pm]

[ mood | disappointed ]

[ music | Coldplay ]

Fucking hell..
Once I start having a good day,
someone HAS to make it worse.
My day will get better.. I hope.

[ 1 thorn Scratch away the skin]

Uhh.. no comment. [09 Mar 2004|01:43pm]

[ mood | chipper ]

[ music | [Why] ]

Derek came over today.
He picked me up, and we went to Danie's.:)
Then we took his friend some food.
He made my day oh so much better.
I'm glad he was able to come over today.
Otherwise, I would have been in a really shitty mood all day.
Lol, I noticed I mentioned the other night too much.
Oh, well?
THANKS AGAIN DEREK!!!

I'm so happy.. I haven't been this happy in awhile.
I'm just happy I got to go out today, and see a couple of my friends.
and actually had a good time.
I love you guys, :)

Ok. :)

[ Scratch away the skin]

[09 Mar 2004|09:56am]

[ mood | awake/sore ]

[ music | Incubus, of course. ]

The other night is all that's been running through my mind lately.
I feel like shit today..
It was all so fucked up,
fucked up real bad..
I've been talking to people about it.
But, yeah..
I finally told Derek the truth about what really happened.
He's kind of making me feel better about all of this.
It's good to know that the last few people I told, have been so chill about it.
I just feel that I have to tell most people.
I hate it, too.
I don't know what to say to anyone anymore.
Danie, Tracey, and Derek.. you guys really helped me.
<3Thanks.

I hate this year..
SO fucked up.
I want everyone to know, I'm sorry for all the stupid shit I've done.
I just want my old friends back.. I want things the way they used to be.
Yeah, Danie might be coming over this weekend,
I miss her.
She's always so chill about everything.
Thanks, Danie, for always being there.

me and Kaitlyn have been good friends lately.
I told her about what I did..
and she was cool about it.
:) Thanks.
Lol, sorry if I annoyed you with my talkativeness.

I'm sooo goddamn sore.
my legs, hips, arms, stomach.
I hate this shit.
My nose is all shitted up.
Clogged, but not.
I keep stretching out my sinuses and sniffing.
(cough)

Well, I don't know what else to talk about, I'm kind of distracted.
I'm looking up information on some shit.- so, more later.

[ 2 thorns Scratch away the skin]

[08 Mar 2004|09:01pm]

[ mood | confused ]

[ music | Switchfoot ]

:\ im nervous.. i really hope this shit works.

[ Scratch away the skin]

[08 Mar 2004|07:01pm]

[ mood | crappy ]

you know what?..
FUCK ALL OF YOU MOTHER FUCKERS!!
..yeah, exactly what I just said.

EDIT
I try to fucking talk to you about my problems,
and what do you do?
FUCKING HURT ME EVEN MORE!
I know.. It wasn't right.
But, fuck that shit.
'friends' are supposed to fucking be there for eachother.
Fuck this, I'm out.

[ 14 thorns Scratch away the skin]

[08 Mar 2004|05:31pm]

[ mood | chipper ]

[ music | Blink =-O ]

Ahh!! today was so fucked up!:)
I was hyper off my ass.
Didn't really sleep last night.
I had a pretty good night.
Mom called me at 6 AMish and found out i was gone.
i lost track of time.
i said i was out to breakfast with a friend.
and she wanted to meet my friend.
lol, so we went back to the house after a little bit, and my mom was like, hi.
lol FUCKING GAY.

Damn.. I feel stupid. Maybe I'll tell you if you ask me.

[ Scratch away the skin]

[08 Mar 2004|07:15am]

weeeeeeee.. except not.

aaahhhaaa FUCK!

[ Scratch away the skin]

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